My Sin, His Sacrifice
by OreoFudge'D
Summary: after a car crash, Edward loses his memories, leaving Bella broken. after 3 years, they meet again for a mission and Edward falls for Bella. what will happen if he remembers everything? are they going to be best friends forever or something more? EXB
1. prologue the past

Prologue: The Past

I never thought that life would be better, for me. I have a happy and complete family. My mom is a lawyer, my dad is the FBI chief, my big bro is a CIA agent, and I used to be one of them, Living in a house with people who works with the law made me see the world in a different perspective. For me, the world is full of opposites; life is always at risk. What I didn't expect is that I'll slip when I took the risk.

I lose my best friend because of that. He didn't die, but our memories did. It hurts me a lot, surviving and knowing everything clearly, facing everything alone. It ruined my life. Losing an important someone who knows you like yourself is like losing yourself as well. My best friend have forgetten everything because of me.

I am Isabella Marie Swan, a coward, a loser. I don't care if I continue to drown myself by taking all the Anthony Cullen is my bestfriend. As I try to move on and run from my past, I try to relive our memories to myself. The pain in too much to handle, but I've learned to become numb. I could deny my feelings by keeping my guard. He might've moved on, but me? Never,

This is our story. My sin. His sacrifice. Our lives are intertwined like two strings. Once broken, and now is tried to be tied together, again.


	2. 1 the accident and return

**this is for the first reviewer, for the hits and alerts, and for everyone else! :] so keep reading and reviewing. much love. 3  
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**disclaimer: owns nothing. yadda. :]

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1. The Accident and Return

_Flashback -- 3 years ago._

_"Prepare for the shot in 10 counts!", a voice from the earpiece shouted._

_Exactly at th count of 10, the shots were fired, the door was ripped apart, and everything else is in motion. Streaks of gray from the CIA agents' suits dashed in a blur. I was watching in the corner, too afraid of what I've just seen. Suddenly, a hand covered my mouth._

_"Shh. Bella. We've got to leave now.", Edward whispered. His emerald orbs are full of worry and concern. Never have I ever seen him before like this._

_"O-okay.", I replied._

_He carried me bridal-style, running at the shadows of the night. In a small moment of time, he carried me inside. He started the engine; it roared and it started to move._

_"Bella. Are you okay?", his voice is strained._

_"Yes I am. You?", I asked._

_"I'm fine.", he answered as the needle of the speedometer passed 100._

_"Edward. Slow down." I tried to keep calm, but my voice is full of worry._

_"No. We can't. If the others are chasing us right now and we slow down, we'll be in , we won't see the light of the sun again. So please. Stop worrying.", he touched my hand. I looked at him, and I saw a small smile in his face. I felt my lips form a curve too._

_"Okay. I'll stop worrying if you put your seatbelt on. Please?", I begged._

_"Sure." He put his seatbelt, never taking his eyes off the road._

_"I'm just. Shocked. I've never faced something like that. I shouldn't have been an idiot by falling for the trick. Sorry for not following you. I'm just afraid.", I apologized. My eyes are already tearing._

_"Don't be afraid. Everything's fine now. I'm here, you're safe with me. I'll always be here for you." He wiped the tears away and kissed my forehead._

_"Thanks best. For saving my life there. I owe you a lot. And. I love you." I just blurted out the words. I can feel my emotions reach its peak._

_"Anything for you. I love you too, Bella." He whispered as our foreheads touched. One second, we're beginning to confess our feelings for each other. And the next.._

_"Edward! Look out!", I shoutes, but it's too late. The truck is just a foot away from us._

_He engulfed me in a protective hug, releasing his tight grip from the steering wheel. As the truck crashed on his side of the car, my head hit the glass too hard, and everything went black._

_End of Flashback_

-----

"Flight from London have now arrived.", the voice in the speaker said. It's been 3 years since that worst day of my life. As I try to run away, memories never cease to haunt me. Every night, the scene plays on my dreams, and I wake up sobbing. I can't blame anyone; if I just controlled my emotions that day, maybe we have a happy ending.

It's cowardly of me to just run without saying goodbye to my friends. I missed them a lot, Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, and Ed-. It's still hard to think about his name. Everytime I think about his name, his words before I left burned my heart.

_What Bella? Who is Bella? I don't know her. I'm sorry._

I tried to hide the agony as I stepped outside the automatic doors of the airport. Welcome back to the place where my past belongs.

"Bella! Honey! How's Oxford?", my mom hugged me tight. She really missed me, I guess.

"Oxford is fine. Thank you for the graduation present.", I answered back, smiling.

"Bella it's great to see you. My big girl's back!", my dad hugged me too after my dad released me.

"Mom. Dad. I thought you have work. Why are you here?", I asked. They were usually occupied with office work.

"Well. We missed our only daughter. Office can wait. And I'm so proud of her, being an Oxford genius.", my mom complimented.

"Your mom is right. Well. We have to go home now. You need rest.", my dad put his arms on my mom's waist as my mom drag me. We walked to the car, then we take off. I shouldn't worry. I know I have to face this sooner or later.


	3. 2 the new job rosalie and emmett

**okay. here's chapter 2. read and review. :] cheers for the first reviewer, again. this is for you, and for everyone. :D**

**much love.**

**diclaimer: owns nothing. yadda. :D**

**p.s.: edward will be coming in the next chapters. now is not a good time. :)  
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2. The New Job; Rosalie and Emmett

"Hello dearie.. What time are you going home?. Sure. She's like a daughter to me. And obviously my future daughter-in-law. She always welcome in our house.. Good. See you soon Em. Love you.", my mom said over the phone.

"Emmett. Rosalie's coming over.", my mom filled my unspoken question.

"Oh my gosh." I muttered. "I can't see her. She's probably angry at me ditching everyone without warning. Mom, what am I going to do?", I asked. I'm starting to have hysterics. I'm literally banging my head on the car's headrest.

"Don't worry. She's not angry at you. They didn't hold a grudge on you. They understand why you did that. They're just sad.", my mom assured my.

A few minutes more of driving and silence passed. At 4 pm we reached our house. It's still the same. Same old circular driveway, hidden garage, stone-carved fountain, garden surrounding the porch. The feeling is really welcoming. I missed home.

Mom and Dad helped me carry my luggages in my room because we don't have house helpers. The driver's from the headquarters. They give me time to unpack and think. As I try to memorize every corner of my haven, I remembered the times Edward and I have spent together here. Like the old times, we're just fooling around. Either he's helping me escape from being Alice's and Rosalie's Bella Barbie, helping him outwit Emmett's pranks so that they'll backfire on him, or just playing hide and seek. I didn't realize the tears falling. If I could just change time...

I was pulled from my own reverie when the doorbell rang. I heard muffled voices and footsteps. Good thing our house has only one floor and has wood as cover flooring. I was about to show up when my mom pushed me back inside my room.

"You'll make your entrance from the kitchen. Prepare the soup and shout 'Dinner's ready'. Good?"

"Good.", I answered.

I sneaked from my room, then down to the kitchen. The soup didn't take too long. After a while, it's time.

"Dinner's ready!", I shouted.

I heard my parents snicker from the other room. maybe they look funny. Priceless. _I should've taken a picture of them, _I thought. Suddenly..

"When did you come back? When? How come you didn't even call or talk to me? It's been 3 years since the last time I saw and talk to you for heaven's sake! Do you know how much the group missed you? You left without even telling me?! Your ever caring brother?! Are you nuts?!", Emmett shouted in a rush then grabbed me to a hug.

"Emmett-*_cough*_-can't-*_cough*_-breathe..", I choked.

"I'm sorry. I just missed you. Hmm. Well look at you. You look great li'l sis!" Emmett complimented. I blushed. Is this really the effect of leaving your crazy brother for 3 years then returning without notice?

In the corner, I saw Rosalie still staring. Maybe she hates me and can't accept me anymore. I was in a verge of tears whe she pulled me to a tight embrace. I noticed she's crying too.

"Don't scare us like that again Bella. You don't know how worried we are when you suddenly disappeared.", she chocked out from tears.

"I won't leave again big sis. Sorry for the past.", I apologized, trying to stop the sobs breaking out.

She released me from her hug. As always, Rose is still very beautiful. Loose blonde curls, sparkling blue eyes, luscious red lips, and a go figure. She observed me, looking at me from head to toe.

"You're right em. Bella, you look more beautiful. You're glowing.", she commented, smiling evilly. I can now imagine what she's thinking: makeovers, shopping trips, gah!

"Ugh. Stop with those beautiful thingies. Let's eat.", I complained. I hate their compliments. Do they need to visit their eye doctor? I'm just a plain Jane.

I dragged them to the table, seeing my parents already eating. I sat beside Renee as Emmett and Rose sat side by side across us.

"Bells. I've got you ajob. Same as before. You in?", my dad started to discuss.

"When do you need me?", I asked. I ignored his question; he knows my answer to that. Fire started to burn me internally. _Same as before._

"It depends on Emmett. He's the group's big bear and so is Rosalie.", he replied. I looked at them.

"When we meet with Jazz, Al, and Ed.", he simply said. As if there's no yesterday. As if nothing happened when he said that. I swallowed the lump forming on my throat. I have to work with _him_ again.

"Bells, it's fine if you don't want to do it. I know it's hard..", Emmett added, but I stopped him.

"It's fine. Tell me when. Even tomorrow will be fine. I don't care, just do it ASAP.", I stopped him, coldness wrapping on every word that exited my mouth. I put my dished in the sink. Not feeling too good, I escaped to my room.

I just wish I can be numb. I just wish I could be a good liar and hide my emotions. I have to cry every tear tonight. I have to restrain myself afterwards. This is my sin, I just returned to put everything in place.


	4. 3 meeting alice

**this is chapter 3. :) read and review. thank you. :]**

**diclaimer:owns nothing. yadda. :] much love.

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3. Meeting Alice

I woke up the next morning a little early. 7am. Perfect. I still have time before Rose torture me after her night with Emmett. I shuddered. Nasty thoughts. I was about to open the door when someone knocked. I opened the door and saw Emmett.

"Hey. Good morning. What's up?", I asked him, confused.

"I'm sorry for being an idiot last night. I didn't mean to offend you.", he apologized, looking at the floor. It's funny looking at my giant of a brother apologize like a 7-year-old.

"Big bro. It's nothing. You're forgiven.", I smiled at him as he pulled me to his signature bear hug.

"Better get ready. Rose will start torturing you in about 5 minutes or so.", he reminded me, then he disappeared on the hallway. A few minutes after I took a shower, Rose pulled me.

"It's time for some Bella Barbie time!", she sang.

After an hour full of brushing, curling, and a lot more, she's done. Good for her, I didn't think about whining during the process.

"Tada! Wonderful. You may now look at the mirror.", she pushed me off the chair to the mirror.

What I saw in the mirror is definitely not me. Instead of ghostly pale skin, messy hair, and lifeless eyes, I saw agirl with cheeks of cream and roses, natural looking light red lips, full eyelashes framing chocolate brown orbs. The girl in the mirror looked gorgeous.

"Rose. Thanks. It's..wow. Thanks for not going overboard.", I hugged her as she squeezed a little back.

"We'll have the hugs later. Wear the clothes I prepared. We're going to be late.", she exited the room, giving me time by myself.

She prepared a dark blue long sleeved, low U-neck long fitting shirt that shows my 'curves' as they say. She picked my favorite black skinny jeans -- good for her -- with the bronze-colored large belt. Good thing she remembered setting flats for me -- my favorite black and white ones.

-----

"So here's the plan. We meet Alice at Guess. You hide in one of the dressing rooms, and I'll let her change there. Got it?", Rose discussed during the car drive.

"Alice is going to flip. I'm sure of that. She would look like she's seen a ghost." Emmett guffawed, sending vibrations to the jeep. Rosalie removed her high heeled stilettos and smacked it at the back of Emmett's head. Ohh. That sure hurts. I laughed.

"You should do that everytime. It seems to shake him to his senses.", I suggested. Rose smiled at the idea and gave me a high-five, while my brother glared at me from the mirror.

-----

Rosalie, you've got to choose something too. It's been 2 weeks since our last shopping trip.", I heard Alice whined. Typical Alice, dragging you inside every store at the mall. She might look like apixie, but the girl's filled with strength.

"Okay fine. I'll pick something while you're fitting. Just go now.", I heard her push Alice because she hit the door of the dressing room I'm in. When she opened the door, the blood on her face drained and she looked at me with disbelief.

"Don't tell me you're a ghost.", she stated quietly. I feel the tension in her voice.

"Alice. I'm no ghost. I'm really here. Don't even think about jumping to conclusions that you're dreaming." I replied.

Quickly, as if I'm disappearing in a second, she grabbed me to a tight hug, just like Rose did last night. She started to sob in my arms.

"Why did you leave? Do you know how worried am I? Do you know how it feels when you lost connection with your best friend?", she continued to cry. I let a few stray tears fall, then wiped them quickly as I comfort her.

"I'm sorry. It's just that..it's hard. It's hard to stay here. I just can't imagine how his word would pierce me. Every word killed me Al. And everytime I see him, the memories of that night haunt me all over again. I can't stop blaming myself about what happened to him. Doctor's say there's no battle in him recovering the past again, because we're already losing. Sorry for leaving without even saying goodbye. It's just..", I started to sob too, my chest aching from the pressure. I still remember the time before I step out our house; my muscles won't move.

_Flashback_

_Everyone's in the hospital instead of me and dad. Today, another round of test for Edward. I have to leave. I still can't take in the words he said._

_As I closed our front door, I felt my senses cut off. I felt numb. I didn't realize I was sobbing until dad hugged me, pulling my pieces together._

_End of Flashback_

"Your mom explained it to us. We know the pain you're going through. Renne and Esme cried all day. We moped. Nobody's blaming you for what thing Charlie's with you for the first 2 weeks. He'll probably hate seeing us with puffy eyes." she laughed and I joined her. I've caused them too much pain, I deserve to die.

"You know what? We better go now. I'll be meeting chief. You coming?", I asked her as we exited the dressing room, dumping the clothes.

"Sure. Of course. Everyone would love to see you back.", she smiled as she dragged me outside to meet Rose and Emmett.

"Mission meeting Alice is accomplished; next stop: Meeting with the crowd.


	5. 4 the mission and comfort

**sorry about the mistakes. :] i appreciate that you can see the. thank you. this is for everyone. read and review.**

**disclaimer: owns nothing. :]**

**much love.**

**-danni. (my name) :]  
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6. The Mission and Comfort

Emmett drove us to the familiar path. Huge trees line up on both sides of the road. We opened the windows to let the chilly air in the jeep. I sighed. I missed this air -- the air I feel whenever we have to rush to headquarters. Another home, another thrilling experience, another reason for happiness. Now, the feeling it sends me is full of nervousness, confusion, but it is counteracted with excitement.

A few minutes later, we entered a beautiful arched garage. Just like before, the entrance is concealed. No one will even now it's a passage to the headquarters. Inside it are numerous vehicles of different kinds -- cars, mini-trucks, etc.

Emmett stopped in front of the automatic sliding glass doors. He left his jeep there, and motioned us to follow him inside. When he entered, the guard nodded at him with a playful salute that he returned back; Rosalie with a huge smirk and wink that she returned; Alice with a high five. When my turn arrived, I saw him stare at me, and so is everyone else that's in there. I even heard some of them whispering.

"Is that Swan?" "Bella's back?" "Oh my gosh. She looks gorgeous." "Bella Swan?" "Is she here for rela?" "I think she won't be back." "Oh. Bella's hot." "When did she return?"

I tuned out the murmurs, knowing that they'll just annoy me. It gives me headache, their senseless compliments and questions. Can't they just ignore the fact that I'm here? So what if I'm back after all this time? That doesn't change anything. I know I was zoning out because out of nowhere, someone tugged my arm and whispered my name as the one in front of me turned around. Jasper. Alice's brother, another big brother of mine, Emmett's ally in every prank he plans.

"B-be-bella? Oh my gosh. Alice honey, why didn't you inform me?", Jasper smiled happily at me then turned to Alice to give her a peck on the lips. Full of love. I can't face something like that, especially when it's deprived to me.

"Sorry Jazz. She also surprised me. Rose's idea.", she pointed to Rose who is smirking in Emmett's arms.

Jasper hugged me tight. "How are you Bella? I must say, you look wonderful.", he commented.

"Enough commenting.", I groaned teasingly. "I'm great now that I'm back, you?" I asked, now smiling.

"We're indifferent, until this moment. We are so great! Come on. You've got to surprise Truman.", he and Alice dragged me, Rose and Emmett in our flanks. They led me to the black double-doors which was opened by two guards in black suits.

"Chief! Look who's here.", he shouted. They still act like kids, and I love them because of it. Chief Truman, Richard, or Richie, is the 50-year old chief who acts as our father-figure in the office. Sometimes, he's more cchildish than us.

Truman sttod up from the sure, a silly grin plastered in his face. Trust him always smiling, there's never a bad day with Truman.

"Bella. It's nice to have you back. How have you been? It's been three years, so long.", he hugged me warmly.

"Life's a bore without the missions to heat up the blood.", I smiled at him. That line is our motto everytime we have celebrations after a successful mission. I'll always remember that words; they're irreplaceable.

"I do know that you're here for something important.", he finished the welcoming. I know that voice; he only uses that if there's something important.

"Yup chief. I'll be happy to work with you again."

"Yes. We are too. But this is something complicated. Unlike your other missions, this is risking your life.", he explained.

"Danger is my thing. I always risk my job whenever I step on a battlefield. I'll handle this, just like before.", I replied back.

"You should understand. This is not just a game, this is your life. Are you willing to pass through this again? Losing important things in your life. I'm sorry if I'm offending you, but you have to understand. This mission wants you to put your life at the edge of a cliff."

"I understand if you think you offended you. My life ended that day, years ago. The time he lost his memories, I also lose myself. Everything I've got is his past. I'm too attached to him. It's my fault that we know each other as much as we know ourselves. I don't care if I die in this mission. I don't have the life, I'm just living. Now tell me about that damn mission. I have to get over it.", I said. I don't care if they heard everything. I know their eyes are apologetic, but my heart is already dead.

Instead of talking, he passed me a black clearbook, written _Confidential _in front. It means no one has seen it except for the high ranks. I opened the clearbook, and was shocked with what I saw.

_Isabella Marie Swan._

_Underwatch._

_Followed by Victoria Johnson and Tanya Denali. Chasing the subject for the death of their boyfriends, James Devaughn and Laurent Bonson, suspects of the drug trafficking three years ago. Accident had a large damage: Agent Edward Cullen lose his memory, Agent Isabella Swan went away. Believed that the subjects doesn't chase Cullen because they've got payback: memory loss. No memory or past about Swan or is followed from the time she departed or Europe by suspects and secret agents._

_Watchers:_

_Year 1: Crowley, Mallory_

_Year 2: Newton, Stanley_

_Year 3: Webber, Yorkie_

_In-charge: Cheney_

_Be back for mission._

_Year 4: , R. Hale, J. Hale, A. Cullen, E. Cullen_

_Signed_

_Richard Truman_

_CIA Chief_

"You're watching me. Every move.", I stated. I was too surprised by the turn of events.

"Bella. We didn't mean to. We've got to keep you safe. I'm sorry.", he apologized, trying to explain.

"Don't worry. I actually owe you big time for watching over me. If it weren't for you, I would be six feet below ground now.", I laughed at my joke.

"Whatever happens, we can't let anything happen to you. It's your parents orders. They love you so much. And the higher rank's. They care for you."

"I really appreciate it, but you shouldn't have bothered. I have to tell you this. I'm better dead years ago than standing here in fron of you. I was the one to blame. It's my fault, and I can't do anything to make my mistakes right again. I've caused everyone enough damage. I'm so weak, I can't change anything. If you think I'm a good agent, then you're wrong! If I'm a good agent, I shouldn't have been an idiot to fall for their trap! If I didn't do that, Edward should be living a happy life now! I'm no good, I don't deserve this life! Edward should have his memories with him now, and I should've been dead in that crash!", I was too hurt to control my outburst. I've never had an outburst in front of anyone before. This is a frist. It's also one of the reasons why I went away.

I sat in the floor, crying away the tears I tried to hide since the time I returned here. The memories really hurt. I thought humans can forget. Why do memories have to linger in my mind and let guilt wash over me? I was clutching my chest, when someone pried my fingers off them and pulled me to a tight hug. That someone let me sob on his chest while brushing the small of my back. A familiar spark of electricity run on my body where that person's skin touched mine.

"Chief, what did you do? Why is she crying? You didn't even comfort her.", a too familiar voice yelled. _Him_. I continued to sob. Why does he have to come now? I don't want to see him.

"Hey. Who are you? Are you alright? Did Richie say something wrong?", he put a finger on my chin, forcing me to look at him. I looked at his eyes, familiar emerald orbs that make me melt. We stayed like that for a long time; everyone's too shocked to react, him looking at me full of concern, and me crying.

"Uhm. Do I know you from somewhere? You look too familiar. Have I seen you before?", he asked again. This time, the words crushed me. He never remembered.

Before anyone tried to talk, I ran away from his arms and rushed to the headquarter's library, my favorite place in this place. I sat on my favorite couch placed on the last isle and lie down. I can't control the tears anymore. Why does he have to be the one to comfort me? Why does he have to see me cry? Why does he have to tell me that I look familiar to him? Didn't he bother to know what his past is? And the most important: Why do I have to cry and have an outburst? I thought I've perfected my skill in being emotionless.

So many questions, though the answers are all locked in a far-away place. I have too search for it. Like this mission, I have to solve it. So what if I die? Who cares? My family, my friends. Yes. But it doesn't really matter. The one I want to worry about my existence doesn't even know me.


	6. 5 the talk and new step

**this is the new chappie! sorry for the late update. read and review.**

**disclaimer: owns nothing. only ideas. :]  
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5. The Talk and New Step

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

That annoying clock. Pft. It always makes ways to wake me up while I'm in the middle of escaping reality. It never fails. Just like before. I can't blame it; I love that clock.

It must be a long time since I sleot because my leags abd arms are too stiff and my head aches. I moved my arms and legs to strech. I opened my eyes and say two pairs of blue eyes staring at me.

"Bella. Oh my god you're awake! I'm so happy!", Alice squealed as she hugged me. When she released me, I sat on my bed. I looked at the clock - 2:00. The sun is high outside. It's 2 in the afternoon.

"How long am I asleep?", I asked, groaning as I shook my head.

"You're out for 3 days, actually. How are you?" Rose asked worriedly.

"I'm fine, I guess. My head hurts and so are my eyes." I yawned. I still need sleep.

"I'm sorry for my brother. He shouldn't have interrupted us like that. Sorry if he's an idiot to hug you there. I know how much pain are you feeling. I can feel it too, at first. I know he's the one to blame, so don't bother yourself from worrying about this and that." Alice apologized, shaking her head angrily.

"Uh. W-w-what? What's with the sorry thing?", I asked. I remembered the folder with confidential. There are names, Victoria and Tanya. There are watchers on the list, Swan, Hale, Cullen. Then there's memory loss. Agent Edward Cullen. Agent Isabella Marie Swan. Then sobbing. Outburst. Telling everyone I'm not a good agent and it's my fault that Edward doesn't have a happy life. Then the spark as someone hugged me close, letting me sob at him. Him yelling at Richie, telling him things. Then those emerald orbs. Edward. A sob broke from my chest again.

"Shh Bella. Just cry it all. I know it needs time. I know it hurts. Just let it out." Rosalie comforted me. I backed off her and wiped the tears.

"I'm s-s-sorry. It's just hard to think about it all over again. The memories. Everytime I think about it, the crash just replays in my mind. i'm watching it. Watching the last moments that we're together and that we know each other. When we're kids, he promised he'll never leave. He'll never forget me, but he did. And it's my fault. If I didn't just get too emotional..", I stopped and hugged my chest. They both hugged me.

"Bella. I know there's something more that time. I never thought that it would hurt you so much. I know that you're so close, best friends, but this hurt. This hurt that I'm witnessing in you is not just that simple. It kills you inside. Someone like me isn't used on seeing you like this. You're empty. You may be here, but your life is somewhere else." Alice said.

"What makes you think there's more? Is it that obvious that I can never move on? Is there any way I could deny this so others around me might not be affected?", I asked her.

"You can't deny it Bella. We all know it's hurting you too much. And the look in your eyes. I know there's something else."

"It's just that. His last words to me before the crash. He said that he loves me and he'll do anything for me." I remembered those things in perfect clarity.

_Flashback_

_"Thanks best. For saving my life there. I owe you a lot. And. I love you." I just blurted out the words. I can feel my emotions reach its peak._

_"Anything for you. I love you too, Bella." He whispered as our foreheads touched. One second, we're beginning to confess our feelings for each other. And the next.._

_"Edward! Look out!", I shouted, but it's too late. The truck is just a foot away from us._

_He engulfed me in a protective hug, releasing his tight grip from the steering wheel. As the truck crashed on his side of the car, my head hit the glass too hard, and everything went black._

_End of Flashback_

"B-b-bella. I'm so s-s-sorry!" Alice shouted as she hugged me tight. She's sobbing too. I looked at Rose and saw her mouth wide open.

"Bella. I understand.", she simply said. "Do you want Emmett to know? And Jasper?"

"I'm sure they have too. But they might be busy.", I answered. Maybe I'll tell them when we have time.

"It's nothing. Silly. They're all downstairs.", she kissed my cheek as she strolled outside.

"Bella. Are you sure you're fine? I mean. You just learned that he loves you. In a different way. Then the crash, memory loss, you going away and coming back then him comforting you. There are lots of things to tell.", Alice said. She wiped the last tears in her face.

"Of course. I can't do anything to reverse what happened. I should've just died.", I told her. Death is the only solution to end this.

"Actually, there's a lot to share. I suggest we wait for them to come here.", Alice smiled a little, then the door opened, revealing Rosalie, Emmett, and Jasper.

"Hey sis. Good you're up." Emmett hugged me in a bone crushing hug. He passed me to Jasper who hugged me in the same way.

"Thank you." I smiled a little.

"I think we should start telling you the story of what happened.", Alice interrupted.

"When the paramedics arrived at the crash site, both you and Edward are not breathing. No pulse. We all thought you're dead. They revived both of you, and you both show signs of life at the same time. They have to do things, stitching wounds and everything. Edward went on a risky brain surgery, which would either kill him or make him live. We told that to you, and you just cried and told us to make him live. They put you to a medical-induced coma so that you won't feel the pain. After the surgery, Edward slipped into coma and you woke up. I just can't believe the story and what happened.", Rose sobbed in my brother's arms.

"You should've just, let me die." I whispered.

"We can't Bells. If we just let you die, we know for sure Edward will follow right away. We're sorry Bella. We just can't." Jasper looked at me with sad eyes.

"I understand. I'm sorry." I looked at my hands. What does Jasper mean with Edward following me after I die? Does he know?

"We know he loves you too much Bells. Rose told us the story. I can't believe it! My best friend fell in love with my sister. She also is in love with him! And he loses his memory. Bells. You need to fight." Emmett said. Wow. He starts seriously, makes jokes in the middle, and ends with an advice. It's like mature Emmett.

"How? Tell me the reason. Did he try to remember his past when he learned that he lost them? Did he?", I asked, my voice rising an octave higher.

"Bella. He didn't because he said that he can make new ones. He wants to make happier memories. He said that if someone holds his heart from the past, then the present can look for ways to let the two of them meet each other again. They'll fall in love the second time around and they'll be together in the future. Bella. He knows that someone loves him before. He knows that that someone loves him back. His mind may have forgotten you, but his heart never would." Alice answered. I sat there, too speechless to react.

"We saw the way he tried to comfort you. His eyes are sparkling for the first time in three years. Bella, he can feel love again. When you're still asleep, he never left your side. He just sits here, then Alice and Rose woul enter and he'll ask questions about you. He saw some of your pictures with him, and he always asks what's with the boy and you. They just answer that you're upset because you lost the boy. He never knew that he's that boy." Jasper explained. I smiled a little.

"See Bells? There's hope after all. Maybe you should start hanging out with us and you two can make happy memories together. You know, we missed the times when you and Eddie are together all alone. Too much love." Emmett sighed. He's really caring for a brother, and it's obvious that he trusts Edward.

"Thanks. For the advice, I mean. And the story. It helped me a lot to understand. You're right, there's hope. We could start all over again. New and happier memories memories." I smiled a big smile that reached my eyes for the first time in three years. There's always a chance. After all, I'm never giving him up again. New steps, new crossroads, new problems. I know we can face them again, together.

Everyone smiled. Contagious. Then we laughed. I know they're happy to hear me laugh again. Suddenly, the someone pressed the doorbell.

"Stay here Bella. I'm sure Edward would like to spend time with you." Alice smiled as Rosalie winked. The all exited the room to open the door. This time, I am happy. I know there's something right ahead of me that will help me settle things right.


	7. 6 questions

**chapter 6. whew. tell me if it's good or bad. read and review! :]**

**disclaimer: owns nothing. :[**

6. Questions

I sank at my pillow again and closed my eyes when they went out of the room. My head is still throbbing because I was asleep for a long time. Three days? Wow. Is it really that tiring when you have emotional breakdown. Well, I tried to keep everything to myself for a long time, maybe it's just rational.

"I thought you're already up. They told me you woke up, but I think you're still tired." I heard that voice again. Edward. How I missed that voice. It's the only thing that soothes me when I'm having an outburst. I sat up and looked at him as he looked straight at my eyes,.

He still as gorgeous as ever. His bronze hair is messy, like he just woke up. His face is still angular in perfect places. Pale skin, lips that are shaped in crooked smile. Familiar emerald orbs that are shining like gemstones. Same old Edward I loved.

"Sorry for the breakdown I mean. I'm just upset and I've never had the chance to release the pressure inside before." I explained to him, smiling a little. I'm afraid that he'll see me that broken beyond repair, helpless.

"It's nothing. I'm sorry I said those things. I didn't mean to. I don't know what's wrong. I'm sorry." he looked at me apologetically. He's still the same, blaming himself for everything happening.

"It's not your fault. It just happened that you're there. I'm fine now. And it's all that matters."

"Yea." He smiled. "Anyway, why don't we get to know each other?" He suggested. i cringed internally. He doesn't really remember. _New memories Bella. New memories._

"Okay. I'll start. I'm Isabella Marie Swan. But never call me Isabella. Bella will do." I said. I offered him a handshake which he took. There's that spark again. What's with the spark?

"Hi. I'm Edward Anthony Cullen. Just Edward. No Eddie-kins, Eddie-poo, or Eddie." He still hates those names. I laughed. If not for Emmett, he won't have those ridiculous nicknames.

"What's funny?" he asked.

"Eddie-kins? Eddie-poo? Eddie?" I laughed again. He shrugged.

"That brother of yours idea." I patted his back.

"Just let him. He'll stop annoying you after you let him have his fun."

"Hmm. How about we play 20 questions?" he suggested.

"Sure. You start.

"What's your favorite color?", he asked.

"Green. You?"

"Brown. Why green?"

"You see that picture?" I pointed at our picture that's in my study desk. "Can you get it please?" I asked. he stood up and got the picture. It's us actually. It's middle school dance and he's my partner.

"Do you want to here the story?" I asked him. "The story of my breakdown.

"Yes. I want to. I want to know why are you crying that time."

"Well. This boy." I pointed to the young him. "He's my best friend for my whole life. We're so close, like this." I stuck my pointing finger and middle finger together. "We do everything together. I never had a boring time with him. We always like the same thing. He knows me like I know him. It's funny actually, spending my time with someone. We're too attached; there's never a day that we don't see each other."

"What happened to him? You're close right? They told me you lost him." he asked.

"Three years ago, we got involved in a car crash. A second before the crash is the best time of my life. We're confessing our love to each other when that truck hit us. It s-s-still h-h-hurts. The m-m-memories of that day. He s-s-saved me before the c-c-crash. I w-w-will forever be g-g-grateful for him f-f-for this life." I began to sob. He sat at my bed and held me close.

"Shh. I'm here now. If he's not here for you, I'm here." He whispered on my ear. _If you only know who that person is, _I thought. "They told me you just returned after a long time. Why did you leave? If you both survived the crash, like they said, why didn't you wait for him?"

"Because when he woke up, I tried to be there. I want to be there. He can't remember me though. He told me '_What Bella? Who is Bella? I don't know her. I'm sorry.' _ I was crushed that time. Those words. I know he won't lose his memory if I just died before he came. Maybe today, he'll have a happy life and be with someone who'll take care of him. I went away because I don't want to interfere in his life again."

"Maybe if you died, he won't live a happy life." he whispered.

"Why do you think so?"

"Because he loves you. If you died that day, crash or no crash, he'll suffer and follow you anyway. You can't live your life is you have no reason for living. You're the reason why he lives Bella. He loves you. Maybe he's out there, fighting for you. He may not know you, but his heart will always be yours. His heart will never forget the feelings." I looked up and he's smiling at me. I smiled back.

"Enough of my story. Too dramatic." I wiped my tears. "Tell me your story now."

"I lose my memories, that's the only thing they told me. I didn't look for my past because I believe that there are more memories to come. If I left something in the past, I'm sure it can follow me in the present. I just have this empty feeling in my life since the time I woke up. I want the past to catch up. To be honest, when you came, I've never felt so happy. I don't know why. You made me happy, in a sense." He blushed. I blushed too. I didn't expect him to open up to me.

"Maybe we can help each other. Maybe we can fill each other's losses. What do you think?" He suggested while looking down. I know he feels awkward. I lowered my head to look at him from under.

"Sounds good to me." I kissed his forehead. I can't stop it. I just longed to do it for a long time now.

"Thank you Bella." He hugged me again. We fit perfectly. Just like before.

"I should be the one thanking you." I hugged him back as I breathed in his scent. He still smells as wonderful as before.

"Anything for you."


	8. 7 dancing

**okaay. this is all abut their songs. :] anyway. rpatzz: i'll try to warn you if there are fluffs. **

**read and review!**

**disclaimer: owns nothing. :(  
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7. Dancing

"I want to hear more about you and the boy." He said as he finished answering questions. We've been doing this for an hour already. Nobody's calling us so we just go on.

"That boy loves music. A lot. He's a pianist. He plays well. He composes songs too. And speaking of music, we have this list of our favorites." I rose from my bed and went to my cabinet. It holds everything that reminds me of him. I took the cd case that is labeled _Favorites._

"The first song. Every time we have this crazy moments, I actually play them and I dance like hell. I'm not a good dancer, and I sure look like crazy when I do." I explained to him as I press play. I still remember the last time we listened to this song. Way before the accident.

_Flashback_

_"I'm really thankful that you dragged me away from Alice and Rose. You just saved my life from them." I said as I dragged Edward to my room. We're running because Alice might notice that we're gone from their house, which is blocks away from ours._

_"It's my job. Scouts honor." he said as I opened the door of my room. He plopped himself on my bed and took a deep breath. I pressed play on my cd player._

_End of Flashback_

"Are you going to dance now?" he asked playfully.

"Of course. Why not?" I replied as the music started.

Na na na na na na na na

na na na na [x2]

I guess I just lost my husband,

I don't know where he went,

So I'm gonna drink my money,

I'm not gonna pay his rent,

I got a brand new attitude and

I'm gonna wear it tonight,

I wanna get in trouble,

I wanna start a fight,

na na na na na na na

I wanna start a fight,

na na na na na na na

I wanna start a fight

So, So what

I'm still a rock star,

I got my rock moves,

And I don't need you,

And guess what,

I'm having more fun,

And now that were done,

I'm gonna show you tonight,

I'm alright,

I'm just fine,

and your a tool so,

so what I am a rockstar

I got my rock moves and

I don't want you tonight

I took his hand and started to twist in circles while giggling uncontrollably. I have this feeling inside that I'm whole again. The hole made by our dark past is nothing. We are both here to have a new start.

(uhh)

Check my flow

The waiter just took my table,

And gave it to Jessica Simp (SHIT!)

I guess I'll go sit

with drum boy

At least he'll know how to hit, oops

What if this song's on the radio,

then somebody's gonna die,

I'm gonna get in trouble,

My ex will start a fight,

na na na na na na

na he's gonna start

a fight,

na na na na na na na

were all gonna get in

a fight,

So,So what

I'm still a rock star,

I got my rock moves,

And I don't need you,

And guess what,

I'm having more fun,

And now that were done,

I'm gonna show you tonight,

I'm alright,

I'm just fine,

and your a tool so,

so what I am a rockstar

I got my rock moves and

I don't want you tonight

I stopped singing when I heard him sing too. He sang the same part he used to sing before. His voice is still the same as before. As he sing, I felt something warm creep near my heart.

You wern't there,

You never were,

You want it all,

But that's not fair,

I gave you life,

I gave my all,

You weren't there,

You let me fall.

I sang along with him this time. We're both holding my combs as microphones. We're still holding hands, and I'm aware of it. It sends some electricity in my body.

So, so what

I am still rock star,

I got my rock moves,

And I don't need you,

And guess what,

I'm having more fun,

And now that were done,

I'm gonna show you tonight,

I'm alright,

I'm just fine,

And your a tool so,

so what,

I am a rock star,

I got my rock moves,

And I don't want you tonight.

No, no, no, no

I don't want you tonight,

You weren't there,

I'm gonna show you tonight,

I'm alright,

I'm just fine,

I'm gonna show you tonight

We both fell on the bed, laughing happily just like the old times. We're in his position when I introduced the next song to him. "This is the song played during our last dance at mid-school. It was Valentine's day that time. The song's title is perfect for the occasion."

_Flashback_

_"Bella. You know a dance won't hurt. I promised to catch you every time you fall. We've been dancing for the whole night, just us. Don't ruin the moment by rejecting me for the last dance. Please Bella? Please?" He reasoned out as he used the power of his pleading puppy eyes. Damn. That boy sure knows how to make me give in._

_"Why me? The DJ told that you have to dance with someone important to you." I replied back._

_"Because you, Isabella Marie Swan, are my best friend. You are important in my life." He took my hand and pressed it on the left side of his chest, where his heart is. "You are here. So you have to dance with me." I blushed._

_"Fine. The last dance won't hurt." I smiled as he took my hand._

_End of Flashback_

The introduction of the song played. I felt Edward stiffen in my hand. He stood up, offering his hand in a proper way.

"May I have this dance?" he asked.

"Of course." I stood up as I place my hands on his neck and his hands on my waist. I sang along with the song.

If there were no words

No way to speak

I would still hear you

As I get lost in his eyes, I know this lines are true. His eyes mirror the same emotions my eyes have -- adoration, longing, happiness, love. He's right; his heart will never forget the one he loves. I'm still a part of him, as I have always been all this time.

If there were no tears

No way to feel inside

I'd still feel for you

I remembered the times when I became numb enough to ignore everything around me. Amidst the dead feeling of my broken heart, I still feel love for him. Even though he's the reason why I'm broken, I still here for him.

And even if the sun refuse to shine

Even if romance ran out of rhyme

You would still have my heart

Until the end of time

You're all i need

My love, my valentine

Memories might be lost. Words might be swords that hurt. Darkness may overcome. Time may pass away. Everything else may fade. Only one thing is for sure: our hearts are still inseparable. He's one thing I'll want and need.

All of my life

I have been waiting for

All you give to me

You've opened my eyes

And showed me how to love unselfishly

When we met again, he simply touched my heart, and every broken piece is gone. My old heart is whole again. No scar. No bruise. Brand new. It's as if this past years were nothing.

I've dreamed of this a thousand times before

In my dreams i couldn't love you more

I will give you my heart

Until the end of time

You're all i need

My love, my valentine

Every night, when I cry into sleep, his face is the only thing that stars my dreams. He's there to soothe me, to comfort me, even though the new him have forgotten everything between us. The past is still there to help me deal with today.

La da da

Da da da da

And even if the sun refuse to shine

Even if romance ran out of rhyme

You would still have my heart

Until the end of time

Cuz all i need

Is you, my valentine

You're all i need

My love, my valentine

"The next song. That's the song during our junior-senior promenade. As usual, we danced together. Only us, for the whole night. That time, I know I've fallen hard for him." I said as I looked in his eyes. This time, he recognized the song and sang.

The strands in your eyes that color them wonderful

Stop me and steal my breath

Emeralds from mountains thrust toward the sky

Never revealing their depth

Tell me that we belong together

Dress it up with the trappings of love

I'll be captivated

I'll hang from your lips

Instead of the gallows of heartache that hang from above

I'll be your crying shoulder

I'll be love suicide

I'll be better when I'm older

I'll be the greatest fan of your life

I rested my head on his shoulder and breathed in his scent. It's still heavenly. I'll be content staying like this. His hand on my waist hugged me tighter for an unspoken reason. I don't know why, but he looks like he's remembering things. The blank expression in his face. It's like a signal.

Rain falls angry on the tin roof

As we lie awake in my bed

You're my survival, you're my living proof

My love is alive not dead

Tell me that we belong together

Dress it up with the trappings of love

I'll be captivated I'll hang from your lips

Instead of the gallows of heartache, that hang from above

I'll be your crying shoulder

I'll be love suicide

I'll be better when I'm older

I'll be the greatest fan of your life

I've been dropped out, burned up, fought my way back from the dead

Tuned in, turned on, Remembered the things that you said

I'll be your crying shoulder

I'll be love suicide

I'll be better when I'm older

I'll be the greatest fan of your life

I lifted my head and emerald orbs stared down at me. I smiled at him as the last song started. "This song. This is our theme song. It's for lovers actually, but he insists. We had a nonsense quarrel because of it, but it's worth it. I've never listened to this song until now." He sang along with it, but this time I did too.

What day is it

and in what month,

this clock never seemed so alive...

I can't keep up,

and I can't back down,

I've been losing so much time.

'Cause it's you and me,

and all other people with nothing to do, nothing to lose.

And it's you and me,

and all other people.

And I don't know why,

I can't keep my eyes off of you...

Of all other things,

I just want to say that you're still coming all right.

I'm tripping on words,

You've got my head spinning and I don't know where to go from here.

'Cause it's you and me,

and all other people with nothing to do, nothing to prove.

And it's you and me,

and all other people.

And I don't know why,

I can't keep my eyes off of you...

There's something about you now,

that I can't quite figure out.

Everything she does is beautiful,

And everything she does is right.

'Cause it's you and me,

and all other people with nothing to do, nothing to lose.

And it's you and me,

and all other people.

And I don't know why,

I can't keep my eyes off of

You and me,

and all other people with nothing to do, nothing to prove.

And it's you and me,

and all other people.

And I don't know why,

I can't keep my eyes off of you...

What day is it

and in what month,

this clock never seemed so alive...

As the song finished, Edward wiped my tears. I didn't realize I'm crying. But I know it isn't because of the past, they're tears of happiness. I'm happy because we have another chance to correct everything. Mistakes from the past taught us lessons. It gave him more reasons to be happy about new memories. It taught me to forgive myself and let this second chance in my life. It taught us that our love can cross boundaries farther than we can imagine.

"Thank you Bella." He said as the song ended.

"What are you thanking me for?"

"I want to thank you for letting me in your life. I know you're broken and miserable, but I promise to make you happy. I may not replace that person from your past, but I promise to make your life worth living for. I want you to find your reason for going on in this life. I promise never to leave you. "

"You're not replacing him." I said as I brushed his hair. "I've already found the reason to live this life, and I trust you never to leave me." _Again. _I added mentally.


	9. 8 dinner

**this is a chapter for you! i won't be updating tomorrow. saturday, i'll try. please read and review. no review and the next chapter won't be released. anyway, sorry for the mistakes(grammar and spelling).**

**disclaimer: i don't own anything. D:**

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8. Dinner Dates

`We're lying at my bed, simply staring at each others eyes. I could do this forever; this will never bore me. I want to get lost in those emerald eyes. They're so beautiful, and so is the man having them. I'm lucky that I've met him.

"Bella!" Alice sang as she entered my room. We both groaned.

"What is it?" I whined. Why does she always have to come at the wrong time?

"We're having dinner at La BellaItallia. So if I were you, I should be at the shower right now."

"Later please?"

"Naw. No later. Edwar." she dragged Edward outside. "You must go and prepare."

"Can you give us a few moments Alice? Please?" he pleaded.

"Ugh. Fine. Lovesick." she muttered as she exited my room. I sat at my bed, and patted at the side. Edward sat down there.

"You know Alice. Always like that," I explained.

"Dress something nice for tonight, okay? You are my date since everyone's paired up." he said.

"Sure. You too."

"Bella?'

"Hmm?"

He put his hands on my shoulders. I stiffened at the sudden contact, and he rubbed circles for me to relax. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head. I shivered and blushed.

"See you later." he smiled as he stood up and close my door.

-----

"Alice. This is enough." I complained. For the past few hours, Alice had been curling my hair, brushing my face, and picking out clothes. Rose is assisting her.

"There. All done." she clapped twice.

"You know what? Even though you out me into lots of makeovers, I would still look plain."

"Nonsense Bella. You are beautiful, so stop it." Rose interrupted this time.

"Look at the mirror now." Alice dragged me in front of my mirror.

When I looked at the mirror, I didn't recognize the girl facing me. Her skin is cream and roses, her eyelashes frames her chocolate eyes. Her pale skin contrasts beautifully at the knee-length strapless midnight blue dress. There is a golden string belt placed on her waist. Her mahogany hair in curls was placed in a bun with some of it dangling at the sides. She wore ballet flats with a golden ribbon at the top. Overall, this girl is beautiful. Surprisingly, this girl is me.

"Any comments? Or complaints?" Alice smirked from my back. She's wearing a white dress with spaghetti straps. Designed at the bottom right part of the dress where small black flowers are patterned. Her hair is clipped on both side with a pin. Her stilettos are black with clear beads decorating at the straps.

"Alice. This is.. Wonderful. You look great. You did a miracle on me!" I squealed.

"Of course. Anything for you. You deserve it." Rosalie walked to our side. Her red dress wrapped her curves. Her blond hair in curls was let down. She's wearing red high heels. Can she be more beautiful?

"Thank you. Very much." I turned around and hugged them.

"This is nothing. Anyway. Let's get this show on the road. It's not good to let our men wait." Alice led the way, followed by Rose, then me.

-----

As I went to the living room where the boys are waiting, I saw Alice and Rose at their man's side. Edward had his back on my, and he's looking at the ceiling. I sneaked and patted his shoulder.

"Are you waiting for someone?" I asked. He turned around and his eyes went wide the same as mine. He's wearing a dark blue polo with the two top buttons open, showing a little of his chiseled chest. His hair is in usual disarray. As usual, words aren't enough to describe him.

"Yes my lady. I'm actually waiting for you. I believe you're going to escort me for dinner?"

"I believe so. Can we go now?"

"Of course." he placed one arm on my waist as I place one of mine in his. We smiled at each other and he led me outside.

-----

When we reached outside, I saw a silver Volvo. So familiar. It's the same car he used to own before that accident happened. Waterworks can wait; I shoved them down, not wanting to ruin the moment.

"The usual gentleman, he opened the passenger's seat door. I stepped inside and waited for him. He opened his door and entered. He pressed play and Claire De Lune played. Still the same.

"Claire De Lune." I stated. He used to play it in his piano for me whenever I feel bad about something.

"Yes."

"Why?"

"I have those flashbacks every time. This song is always there. The first time I touched the piano after I woke up, this is the second thing I played."

"What about the first?" I inquired. Could it be..

"An unknown lullaby. They told me I used to play it for someone important in my life. I want to meet her again." he explained. It's my lullaby, something he composed for me for my 15th birthday.

_Flashback_

_"Edward. Where are we going?" I asked. As soon as I agreed in coming with him. he carried me so I won't escape. Af if I would._

_"Just wait." By now, we reached their empty house and he let me sat at the couch near the piano. He left me there to play a piece._

_"My gift." he started to press a few keys, then go on with it. It's beautiful; it helps me calm down. By the end of the song, I wiped a few tears and tackled Edward. I cried at his shoulder._

_"Thank you. This is the best gift. Ever."_

_End of Flashback_

"Bella? You okay? You're zoning out." Edward asked as he waved his hands in front of my face. We're now at the restaurant' parking lot.

"Yes. Just remembered something."

"Oh." It's clear in his reaction that he's hurt. I want to forget the past when I'm with him, but I simply can't just ignore it. By the time I stopped thinking about it, my door opened with Edward offering a hand and a smile. I took his hand and we stepped inside, holding hands.

-----

The food is great. The others arrived earlier than us and took charge in ordering our food. We chatted, laughed at things as we wait for our food. The food is great, of course. Mushroon ravioli. My favorite. We sat for a while until someone started playing a song. Once again, Edward offered his hand for a dance which I gladly accepted. We strolled at the dance floor where the other couples are dancing.

_When I think back_

_On these times_

_And the dreams_

_We left behind_

_I'll be glad 'cause_

_I was blessed to get_

_To have you in my life_

"Thank you." I said.

"For what?" he asked, confused.

"You've been a great help. I just started forgiving myself for the past. I want a fresh start. I want to thank you because you're here."

_When I look back_

_On these days_

_I'll look and see your face_

_You are there for me_

"I'm not leaving you." he whispered.

"I trust you with that."

_In my dreams_

_I'll always see you soar_

_Above the sky_

_In my heart_

_There always be a place_

_For you for all my life_

_I'll keep a part_

_Of you with me_

_And everywhere I am_

_There you'll be_

_Well you showed me_

_How it feels_

_To feel the sky_

_Within my reach_

_And I always_

_Will remember all_

_The strength you_

_Gave to me_

_Your love made me_

_Make it through_

_Oh, I owe so much to you_

_You were right there for me_

_In my dreams_

_I'll always see you soar_

_Above the sky_

_In my heart_

_There always be a place_

_For you for all my life_

_I'll keep a part_

_Of you with me_

_And everywhere I am_

_There you'll be_

_'Cause I always saw in you_

_My light, my strength_

_And I want to thank you_

_Now for all the ways_

_You were right there for me_

_You were right there for me_

_For always_

_In my dreams_

_I'll always see you soar_

_Above the sky_

_In my heart_

_There always be a place_

_For you for all my life_

_I'll keep a part_

_Of you with me_

_And everywhere I am_

_There you'll be_

I sang with the last chorus, letting the weight in my chest grow lighter. This song somehow connected to us. How I want him to reach his dreams without any interruptions from me. I want him to be happy, with or without me.

"You're a wonderful person Bella." Edward said as he pulled me closer.

"You're one too." I smiled at him.

"Let's go back now. I'm sure you're exhausted."

"Yup. Let's go back to the table."

We walked together hand in hand to our table. Just like the old times, I feel safe beside him. As always, he'll always be my safe harbor. Iim honored to be a part of his life again. We reached our table, but there's a note left.

_You should know we're watching. Don't think you'd get away with this again._

I remember that handwriting. Victoria's. It can't be. No. She. They are watching me. Every move. I'm unprotected. Is this how fate is gonna work? Is death really close? From the far end of the restaurant, I saw a strawberry blode streak going to the exit's direction. Tanya. They're really here. They're going to take their revenge.


	10. 9 secrets

**another chapter. read and review! please. please. more reviews, faster updates.**

**--sorry for the grammatical and spelling errors.**

**disclaimer: i own nothing. just the plot of this one and of my other stories.**

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9. Secrets

"Bella? Are you okay?" Edward shook me as he held on my shoulders. No. It can't be? How come I didn't notice this? Tanya and Victoria are watching my every move. They want me dead, revenge for what happened to their mates.

"Victoria and Tanya." I whispered, staring in front of me. I can't process anything good in my mind. They really have been here.

"We've got to get you out of here." he quickly flipped his phone to call the others. During the phone call, he held me on his arms tightly. He's afraid I would just disappear in a flash. Soon enough, everyone's back with worry written all over their faces.

"Guys. Stop all the worrying. She didn't touch me. Just close." I explained to them. They all shook their head as Jasper grabbed the paper from the table and read it. Alice and Rose were red with fuming, and so is Jasper. Emmett's knuckles gave a cracking sound as he said strings of profanities. Edward is motionless. I looked at him and he's looking back at me, pain and worry in his eyes.

"Edward. It's fine. Don't worry." I assured him. I want him to stop being silly. I hate it when they worry about me. They have their lives; they have to take care of it. Suddenly, Edward's arms were wrapped around me. I didn't struggle to let go; I held him on me too.

"I have to protect you. I have to." He chanted as we went outside the restaurant.

"N-N-No. You've done a lot."I whispered. i want him to know that he's given his life for me that's why I'm still alive. I owe him a lot. He's done this before, and he sacrificed his old life for it.

"I didn't. All I did was just watch you. I didn't do any good." He was now shaking. I hugged him tight.

"No. Watching me is a big thing. If it weren't for you, I would be dead right now." I said. It's true; if they didn't watch over me all this time, I'm already six feet under.

"Don't say that you're going o die or you should've died." he's angry now. Typical Edward, he doesn't want people around him to die.

"But-"

"Bella, if you're blaming yourself for losing your best friend years back, stop it. You have to move on. I want you to stop it. Think about everyone, about us, about me. I need you here. I don't want you to leave." he pinched the bridge of his nose. I touched his arm.

"Edward. I won't. Okay?"

"Okay." He smiled a little. "We've got to report this to chief."

-----

The whole ride to the headquarters, Edward never let go of my hand. He just let it there intertwined with his. I didn't bother; this is one thing I've wished for the longest time. He's tensed and afraid of what may happen. When we exited the car, he's like a bodyguard who's ready to take a bullet for me. We arrived inside chief's office in a short while with the others.

"They've seen holes on our guard. They're so near." Edward explained as he rubbed his temple. I tried to calm him, and he did.

"I know. Now, we have to hide Bella until we caught them." Richie said as he pressed the controller. The lights dimmed and a screen appeared in front of us. The screen shows a small map of the city.

"Bella needs to stay away from home. We need to get her to the secret base right here." he pointed his laser beam to a small point about 5 miles from our house. The secret house.

"We'll drive her there tonight." Emmett said.

"Good. Everything is set up then. We hide her, and trap them. We need to keep her from the battle." Richie said.

"We'll all stay with her there until we found a lead. We have to keep them from our trail so I suggest we use the underground passage. That way, we'll be sure no one's following." Alice suggested. Everyone nodded.

"Yes. We'll use the underground road. Tell them to prepare." Jasper and Alice nodded as they set off to prepare for our departure.

"Emmett, Rosalie. Be in charge of the supplies. If something unexpected happens, we have to be prepared." Emmett and Rose followed the orders and proceeded as well. That leaves only the three of us at the room.

"Edward." Richie called. He looked at him.

"I trust you with Bella. She's always been a daughter for me and I want you to protect her at all costs." He told him.

"Yes sir." Edward answered.

"Edward, can I have a minute alone with Richie?" I requested. I want him to stop thinking that he has to protect me all the time, so I have to do this.

"Okay." He's hesitant, but still followed and went outside.

"Richie." I face him and walked closer to his table. "I have a request. Please don't react or anything. Let me get over this."

`"What is it?"

"If ever something wrong happens and surrendering to them is the only way, please do accept my decision. I don't want you to bother. If things get complicated, just let me handle it in with my own hands. I started this mess and I have to clean this up. Please?" I pleaded. I know I have to. He won't let me.

I know among all those people, Richie is the one who understands me. He's the one in the middle of everything, hearing my side and theirs when I left. He knows how I feel, and up to what extent I could do for the people I love. He has witnessed what happened before and saw the aftermath of the work when they interrupted. I need to set in his mind that when they repeated that again, the worst may come.

"Bella. I understand. You have my permission over that matter." he smiled sadly. I was too happy about it that I tackled him to a hug. He hugged me back.

"Thank you. You don't know how much it means to me." I cried a little in his chest. I was still too shocked that he accepted. I know that he's also protective, but he's that one who learns from the past.

"I do. Even though I may lose you, I can't blame you for this, right? You love him so much."

"Yes. I do." He pulled me back and smiled at me.

"Edward is lucky to have you. So lucky."


	11. 10 secret house

**okay. another chapter. some fluff! ugh. i'm a ridiculous fluff maker, so please comment on that. read and review!**

**disclaimer: i own nothing. :(**

10. The Secret House

I didn't left Richie's office after my request. I stayed there for a while, discussing the leads and the possible results of our moves. I started to make the strategy of our escape for tonight. We wouldn't run away to another place if ever we got discovered by Victoria and Tanya. Just like I wanted, I'd just surrender and let everything that would happen next in their hands.

After an hour, everything is set up. We joined Edward outside with the others. When he saw me, he approached me and I linked his hand with me. He's the only safe harbor I have right now. He looked at me with caring eyes, and I smiled a little at him. I wanted to assre him that everything's alright.

We reached the basement where the other cars are parked. The back of the jeep is filled with food, while the red convertible next to it is filled with suitcases. There is a silver Volvo beside the two, which is empty. It's just like the old one. I looked at Richie and he smiled a sad smile to me. He understand that I can't just simply leave the past. It's affecting today and tomorrow so much.

"We'll be taking the jeep. Rose lent Alice and Jasper the convertible. Edward and Bella are going to ride on the Volvo. We're going tonight." Emmett said as we walked closer to the vehicles. Edward, being the gentleman, opened my door to let me in first before entering on the other side.

"Are you alright?" I asked him as he started the engine. He seemed to be more tense than me.

"Yes. Just worried." He answered as he pulled out to the hidden passage.

"There's nothing to worry."

"There's a lot to worry. I didn't know that they can get too close. They could've done their work right there. I could've lost you that time." He pressed on break as the car stopped. He placed his face on his hands and leaned on the steering wheel. I placed my arms on his waist.

"Edward. Look at me." I cupped my hands on his face. "I'm still here. You still see me. You can still feel me. You can still hear me. I'm not an illusion here. I'm here for real. You're there that's why I'm safe." I assured him. Looking at his eyes, I remembered one time when I almost got hit by a car. Again, because of my klutziness.

_Flashback_

_"You can run, but you can't hide!" Edward shouted. I'm still running away from him because of our silly game. I reached the sidewalk. I took a big step when I tripped. I saw a fast car heading to my direction. I braced myself for the hit, but it didn't came. I opened my eyes and saw Edward holding me at the sidewalk._

_"You Bella, are one klutzy person. Don't you know the car's about to hit you?! Do you have a death wish?!" he asked furiously as he pressed the bridge of his nose. I laced my hands on his._

_"I'm sorry." He looked at me. He hugged me fiercely._

_"I'm just worried. I don't want my best friend getting hit by a car."_

_End of Flashback_

"I feel you so useless. I lost my memories and you're all I've got. I don't know what else do I have if I lose you." he whispered. I knew he didn't want me to hear it, but still I did.

"Edward. I've lost everything I've got before, but know I have it back." I smiled at I kissed his cheek. "Come on. Cheer up. We're left behind now." I sat back on my seat again as he started to drive. I placed my hand on his knee, reminding him of my presence by his side.

"Thank you." he said in the middle of silence.

"For what?" I asked. What is there to thank me for?

"Thank you for being there for me. It just assured me that there is still hope for me. Even though the past won't catch up, it doesn't matter right now. I'm happy that you're here. It's all that matters." he said looking straight at the road. We're about a few minutes from the secret house now.

"Are you just saying it because it's your duty to watch over me? I don't want you feel responsible for whatever happens to me. I still have a life. I'm still bound to make my own decisions. If ever anything happens, the blame is to myself. There is no one responsible to myself but me." I pointed out. I didn't want to feel his care just because of his job. I wanted to feel his care because I am Bella and he's Edward, though new or old. He didn't answer for a while, and I'm a coward not wanting to hear his side.

We reached the secret house now. It's still as good as new. White walled house with glass-windows on almost every side. It's fully maintained. This house is designed by Edward's mom, Esme. I missed her so much. I opened my door, not even waiting for him to open it for me. I didn't want him to see my broken expression after hanging a very important question without an answer. I tried to run. but he's still the fast one.

"I'm sorry for not answering a while ago. I just.. I just need to collect my thoughts. I wanted to answer what my heart shouts." he reasoned out. My back is pressed on his chest, his arms over my arms, showing no sign of letting go.

"It doesn't matter. This is work. Emotions shouldn't be given credit. Now, if you may excuse me.." I tried to pull myself off of him, but he turned me around and pressed his warm lips on mine.

I didn't see that one coming. It had put my guard down. This kiss, my very first kiss. The feeling is intense: adrenaline is pulsing on my blood in miles per hour. The kiss is a shock to me. A great rush. Something too good to be true. Something meant for reality. The kiss is not a part of my dream. It's happening right now, right here, and my mind wasn't functioning. He broke the kiss, and we're both breathing heavily.

"That's my answer to your question now." he said as he linked our foreheads together. Just like that unfateful night. "What do you think?"

"I think.. I think it's.." I didn't know what to say, but my unruly hormones pushed me to kiss him.


	12. 11 staying away

**this chapter is abolut running away. please read and give it a try. i know it's not a good heart's day gift. read and review as usual. :D**

**disclaimer: i own nothing. :(**

11. Staying Away

The kiss lasted for a pretty long time. My mind went away to dreamland while we're kissing. I knew I have to come back to my senses. I couldn't let this kiss break the walls I've built for a long time. I've learned to stop thinking about Edward. It will just hurt me more.

"Edward." I pushed him away. I looked down. "We can't do this. I...I can't!" I escaped from his hold, and ran inside. A hand stopped me from running and pulled me back.

"Bella. Why?" Edward asked. I could hear his strong and fast heartbeat on his chest.

"Why? Because I'm afraid to lose you! If you just understand. Every time you're near, it makes thing complicated. I can't have you near me! I can't!" I struggled to be out of his arms.

"Do you think you're the only one who's afraid to lose someone? I'm also afraid Bella! Everytime you push me away! I know you're keeping something to me! Don't you think I'm not trustworthy enough?" He turned me around to face him. He shook me again. It's not yet the time to tell him. I knew he'll hate me. I knew I'll lose him again if he knows.

"You won't understand." I said icily. "There are things that should be kept until it's the right time." I felt him loosen his grip on me, so I slipped away from his hands. "Have a good night Edward." I went inside the house.

Inside, Emmett and Jasper were moving the furniture. Alice and Rose are missing.

"Where are they?" I asked them. They looked at me and their faces were down. They've heard it.

"Upstairs." Emmett hugged me. "It'll be fine Bells. Everything will work out."

"Thanks." I kissed his cheek and went to the rooms. I opened mine and saw Alice and Rose lying there, staring at the ceiling.

"Hey. You're tired." I said. Suddenly, the two of them dragged me to the bed.

"Okay. We've heard everything. I know you'll get mad if we do, but I just thought it will be best if we know something about it." Alice explained.

"So you've seen it?" I asked them the obvious.

"Of course we do. We know how happy it feels for once, but we know how it hurts you too. You'd want the kiss if his memories were present." Rose answered this time.

"Wait. Are these rooms soundproof?" What if he's just on the other side of the wall? He'll hear everything.

"Silly. Of course. On the left side is my room, on the right is Rose's. They boy's rooms were upstairs." Alice said.

"Good. Okay. Continue." I motioned for someone to speak.

"So what will happen now Bella? We all know how you are in this things. You're going to ignore him, but you can't. Please. Just be civilized for this. You don't have to be harsh." Alice said while raiding my walk-in closet.

"I don't know." I whispered. I can't just ignore him, right? I'll be living in the same house with him, there's no way I can escape his presence.

"You should relax. Maybe we can go to Volterra. Aro would love that, and so would Caius and Marcus. Jane, Gianna, Chelsea, and Heidi are craving for shopping. The boys are too busy, but they're still good. We should visit them!" Alice suggested, squealing on the word shopping.

"So what do you think Bella?" Rose asked. Both of them are giving me their pouting faces. I thought about their idea for a while. It's a perfect escape to him.

"Sure." They squealed, but I raised a finger. "In one condition."

"What is it?" Alice sat on the couch.

"We'll go without them knowing." They're about to protest. "I'm sure you can inform Emmett and Jasper about it, but please tell them to keep it from him." I requested.

"It's not bad." Rose said. "When are we leaving?"

"As soon as possible. If you want we'll go tonight." I suggested. I want to go away from this place.

"It's fine. Just let us have time with our men." Alice dragged Rose out of my room. I took my phone and dialed Richie's number. A few rings after, he picked up.

"Bella. How are you?" He asked.

"We're.. fine. Richie, can we go to Volterra right now? Please."

"I know why. Don't worry. Your flight is in two hours. See you at the port. Your father will pick you up with your mom." He said then he hung up. I put my phone on the desk, and stared at the window.

I imagined life if Edward didn't lose his memories. Back hen, we're so happy, so content with our lives. If he didn't lose his memory, maybe we'll be there together, him helping me with physical therapy. Most of his injuries were in the memory thing, while mine is in the body. Most of the right side of my body was crushed. If I just died...

A knock on my door startled me.

"Come in!" I called out. I turned around and saw Alice and Rose. Both were already picking clothes on my closet.

"Okay." I closed the door. "Flight is in.." I looked on my watch. "An hour and a half. Are you done with your things? What about Jasper and Emmett?" I asked them.

"We're done with them. The two knows. Can you tell Richie to change the time and make it earlier? He will get suspicious with our acts in no time. Our bags are here already. We'll use the secret door." Alice said. I nodded and called Richie again.

"Richie." I said when he picked up.

"I know you want to rush. Don't worry. Charlie is on the way with Leah and Jacob. They'll be there in a few minutes." He said, then he hung up.

"A few minutes." I said. They nodded.

"We're done." She closed my suitcases. I have two, while each have three.

"Let's go." I was about to pick my suitcases when I heard someone knocked the door. I opened it and saw Emmett and Jasper.

"At least let us help carry these." He took my suitcases and two of Rose's. Jasper picked Alice's and the one from Rose. I closed the door and opened the secret door, hidden on the side of the closet.

We walked on the brightly lit passage. It's still the same since we last used it. The walls are bluish white. The space is wide. We walked at normal pace.

"When are you coming back?" Emmett asked.

"As soon as there are developments on the case. Either we'll move out again or come back here." Rose answered while giving him a kiss on the cheek.

"Just call us when there's a change in plans." Jasper said. Alice nodded and kissed him on the cheek too. After a while we reached the end of the passage. I opened the door and saw the familiar garage. I saw mom, dad, Jacob, and Leah. Jacob is our cousin, Leah's his fiancee.

"Bella." My mom hugged me. "Come on now. You don't want to miss your flight, don't you?" She ushered the three of us onside our family car. Dad and Jacob took care of our suitcases. Leah entered the passenger seat.

The ride to the headquarters to me is silent. Alice and Rose were busy on the phone with their boys. My mom and Leah were talking about office work. I was just sitting there, my mind not with me. They knew that there's something bothering me. I'm glad they didn't ask about it.

We reached the headquarters in no time. We drove straight to the landing area, where a private jet for Volterra is waiting. When we arrived, Richie greeted us and motioned us to hop in. Our bag were settled inside. They all gave us hugs before going.

"Are you sure about this?" my mom asked me as she released me.

"Yes mom. It's for the best." I said. Suddenly, another hug was given to me. I looked at the person and saw Esme Cullen. Carlisle was talking to my father. When he noticed me looking at him, he smiled at me.

"Bella." Esme sobbed on my shoulders. I looked at her.

"Esme. I'm sorry for causing too much pain on your son." I kissed her cheek. "I have to go."

I didn't face them again. I stepped inside the plane and walked inside, hoping for the pain inside of me to subside. I knew I'm acting like a coward, but I couldn't just tell him what happened. It'll hurt more if he'd hate me, right?


	13. 12 family talks

**another family time, but with some of the volturi members. ooc, you might say. please tell me if it's good or bad or okay. read and review!**

**disclaimer: i own nothing.**

12. Family Talks

"Alice! Rose! Bella!" an ecstatic Jane greeted us, followed by the others. Jane was much more like Alice. She's small, her hair was short with bangs, and her eyes were maroon. She's also a shopaholic like Alice.

"Jane! Oh my gosh. Your outfit is so cute!" Alice hugged her. They looked funny.

"Thank you very much for having us here. I hope we're not giving you a hard time." I said. It's been a while since we're here, but if they're busy, we could be somewhere else.

"No you're not. We are so going to have fun!" Heidi squealed. Heidi was tall and has blonde hair. Her eyes were violet orbs with some bluish streaks. She looked like a model.

"You better make sure we're having fun." Rose said. Heidi and her hugged each other like crazy women.

"Bella. We've already planned a bunch of shopping trips. We've got rid of the boys so there's no escaping." Gianna winked at me. She has black hair with striking blue eyes. She's a bit taller than me. I groaned.

"Now Bella. Don't you think we'd let you stay here without a visit to the mall?" Jane asked, one of her eyebrows arched.

"Well. I hoped. But I guess not." I answered, gulping. All of their faces broke to a huge grin.

"Come on now!" Heidi dragged us to the convertible.

-----

"Girls. Are you sure you didn't scare the hell off Bella?" a masculine voice asked as we entered the facility. From the corner of my eyes I saw Gianna and Felix sucking each other's face. On the other hand, Jane and Alec were talking silently and were occasionally giggling. Demetri, on the other hand, was holding Heidi's hand.

"They didn't." He raised his eyebrow. "Well, just a bit shocked. But not scared."

"Well. Good. Because Aro wanted to discuss matters with you."

"About what?"

"Well. Since you're staying with us for a while, Richie informed Aro about the security problems. We've known the four of them for a while know. They used to have their operations here in Volterra."

"They've escaped us." Heidi whispered, looking away with watery eyes. I dropped the conversation,not knowing what else to say. Heidi's mother, Didyme, was used as a hostage of the four. They tried to save her, but they lied about her being alive. They left her dead before escaping. I felt my eye sting. Damn them. Why do they always have to hurt the ones close to us?

"I.. I need time alone. I'll talk to you later." I wanted to escape badly, but Heidi stoopped me.

"Do you mind if I come?" She asked me, her watery eyes staring directly on me. I'm breaking down right now, and it seemed that she would be the best company for me.

"Sure." I linked my hands on hers. "Thanks Heidi."

"No problem Bella. Anytime."

-----

"I'm sorry Bella. It's selfish for me to let my guard down there.." Heidi started, but I cut her off.

"No Heidi. It's fine. I understand." I gave her a hug. We're staying at her room. She was holding on a picture frame, a picture of her complete family. Her dad -- Marcus, smiling happily at his wife -- Didyme. Demetri was Heidi's husband. He was carrying Heidi in a piggyback style. Her sister, Chelsea, was snuggling at her husband, Afton.

"It's just hard everytime I hear their name. Images of that day still linger in my mind. I can't imagine my mom in that stay. She's so good. I..I n-n-never felt so h-h-helpless before." She started sobbing under my hug again. I felt a few teas escape on my own. She's right -- Didyme was a good mother. She's a lot like Esme.

"I know. Shh. Just let it out." I comforted her. She's got to let this out.

"It's s-s-still miss her every day. I want her to s-s-see her grandchildren grow and t-t-teach them. Then when I thought mom was the only thing I've lost, they attacked again." She's trying to calm herself, but without success.

"We didn't expect them to attack that night." She took a deep breath, then continued. "C-C-Chelsea." She sounded so broken when she said her sister's name. "She was unaware of James trying to shot her because of the silencer, but Afton saw it and he jumped exactly as James pressed the trigger. He isn't wearing a bulletproof vest and he got a fatal wound." Another round of tears started.

"Chelsea was oblivious of Laurent at her back because she's crying over Afton. Then Laurent shot her on the heart too. I saw it Bella! I saw her eyes before she died. I.. I d-d-didn't even protect her. I h-h-haven't protected her."

"I understand." I didn't realize I was sobbing too until she hugged me back. How come my tears aren't dry yet? After all the crying I've done back in America, why am I still crying?

"You know Bella. You're a strong woman. I know you're a lot more broken than any of us." She commented. I looked at her and a sad smile graced her lips. "We know you love Edward. We know he loves you back. I can't believe that you're both oblivious about it! But still, when you almost lost him.."

"I have lost him." I stated.

"Okay. You lost him. But still you're living each day as if nothinh happened."

"Heidi. I don't know what else to do." I covered my face with my hands, but Heidi uncovered them.

"Bella. You will find a way. Just a little more time." Her word gave me hope. I would be with Edward again, just a little more time.

"Thank you Heidi." I hugged her, thanking her for the time.

"It's nothing." She waved her hands. "Anyway, we look wasted. Let's clean up a little before meeting with the others.

-----

When we've met with the others, Demetri mouthed a 'thank you' as Heidi held his hand. I shook my head, showing him it's nothing.

"Alice. Rosalie. Bella. Welcome!" Aro greeted us as we entered the conference room. Everyone else is there. They looked up when Aro started the greeting. They said a few 'hellos' and 'good afternoons'. We smiled at them.

"It's a pleasure that you've decided to stay here." Aro smiled as he motioned us to sit.

"It's nice to be back." Alice commented.

"We've been informed about the case you're handling, and we would gladly extend a helping hand. We consider you family, and family comes first." Caius started, determination in his words.

"We really appreciate it." Rose said.

"It's nothing really. Family needs to be protected. Family is important. Family is treasure." For the first time in years, I heard Marcus say a long statement. I saw the faces of the others lit up.

"So we're going to do this together." He stood up and smiled at us with a fatherly expression. I looked at him straight in the eyes. For the first time in three years, I knew someone understand the pain I'm going through. _Thank you Marcus. _I thought.


	14. 13 conversations and reunions

**after a long time, another chapter! i was pleased that this story got 50 reviews in total, but i know you could do better. please please read and review. give this story a chance. **

**disclaimer: i own nothing. :[[**

13. Conversations and Reunions

Everyone was happy because for the first time in years, Marcus was determined. I couldn't blame them for being worried about him. I couldn't blame Marcus for not showing determination or a little effoty in life. He had lost the reason of his living. I knew how he felt.

We talked a bit about the plans. They would be informing us right away about the present happenings back in home and we would keep in touch with them. More like Alice and Rose keeping in touch with their lovers. I would talk to my family and Jasper every once in a while, but not Edward.

Having closure with Edward was still a big no for me. I just got my life back. I was just healed. After three years of living in pain and agony, who wants to have their heart broken again? None, right? Call me stubborn for not giving us a second chance, but guilt was still eating me up. Everytime I get lost in those emerald orbs, it reminds me of what happened, of what I've done.

"Bella. Can I talk to you for a while?" Marcus asked hesitantly. He noticed I was lost in my thoughts. I nodded and followed him in his office.

His office looked the same. His desk was glass in rectanglar shape, his blinds white and open, so he could see the employees working outside. The carpet was black, walls are while, and the metal cabinet was black. Everything was white and black. At the corner of his desk, I saw a picture similar to what Heidi owns. Their whole family with goofy grins in heir faces. I took it, and looked at it closely.

"I missed those times." He arranged the blinds a little. "I missed the time when they're still here, when everyone's happy. I remembered one Christmas, when you visited here with them and the others." He pointed Alice and Rose who were talking to the other girls.

"You had so much fun. You could actually feel love around." He chuckled. I looked at him and saw his eyes become watery. "I.. I miss her." He choked back a sob. "I love her. I thought I could live without her. I tried to move on." He looked at me straight in the eye with his gray eyes and saw the pain he's trying to mask.

"I understand." I looked down. I didn't want to look at him. I was shocked when he suddenly hugged me, like I was his own child.

"Bella. You don't have to hide it dear." He whispered. I could hear the concern in his voice.

"Maybe I love him. I fell in love with him. It was stupid." I wiped my tears for a millionth time.

"Falling in love isn't stupid dear." He took the his family picture from where I've laid it. "You didn't know it was coming until it's too late. Bella, don't be hesitant in falling in love with him because deep within his heart, he loves you too." For the first time in years, I saw Marcus smile a true smile. On that point, I could see the guy Didyme fell in love with. The guy to whom she gave her heart.

_'His heart will never forget the feelings.' _He once said. Maybe he's right.

"Marcus?" I called.

"Yes?"

"Tell me how you told her that you love her. I want to know the story." I pleaded.

"Of course dear." He smiled again. His smile was contagious, just like Didyme's.

"You know that Aro and Didyme were siblings right?" I nodded. "Well. Aro was supportive and likes me for her sister, so I tried. It's like magic. I never thought she'd like me. She's one beautiful lady, and I could never ask for more. Didyme would always be the perfect one for me." I giggled at him. He sounded like a lovestruck teenager. I didn't notice him laugh with me. We didn't notice the door open.

"Oh my. Is Marcus laughing?" Aro asked in disbelief.

"No Aro. He's actually giggling." He smiled at that, but his eyes were full of worry.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"It seems that they tracked down the secret house." I gulped as my eyes widened. "They attacked, but the guys escaped. Don't worry. They're leaving and coming here." _No! I'm not yet prepared! _My mind yelled. "Emmett and Jasper were fine. Just a bruise. Edward sprained his arm. We'll welcome them in a while. They wanted to arrive here ASAP." He went out quickly, avoiding eye contact. I looked at Marcus. He squeezed my shoulder a little.

"He'll be fine. Spend some time with him. It'll help." He advised. I nodded, absorbing the recent events. What kind of luck do I have?

-----

"Mary Alice Cullen. Is this really necessary?" I groaned. Alice let me wear a blue tank top, denim mini skirt with matching blue flipflops. Alice wore a purple shirt and white short 'shorts' with matching purple flipflops. Rose was in a red spaghetti strapped top with black loose half-pants and red flipflops. In a few minutes, they would arrive. I would see him again. I didn't realize Iw as hyperventilating until Alice put a comforting hand on my shoulder.

"Bella breathe. You can face him. I know you can." She assured me with a smile. I took a deep breath and tried to control myself. I didn't have to worry. Everything would pass by smoothly.

I was pacing back and forth every now and then. I was so anxious. _This is ridiculous Bella. It's not like you committed something big. You're just meeting Edward, and it's done. _I repeated again and again in my head. I didn't notice the private jet arrive until I was pulled in a big crushing bear hug.

"Belly. I miss you!" My brother greeted. I tried to breathe, but I couldn't.

"Emmett!" Rose smacked her at the back of his head. "Put Bella down. Can't you see you're about to kill her?" She scolded while my brother pouted as he put me down. I laughed a little on their exchange, but I felt like someone was boring hole on my back. I turned around to see a real life Adonis staring at me.

Edward had a sling on his left arm. He was wearing a fitted black shirt and loose jeans with black converse that made him look great. The color contrasted his skin. His bronze hair was in its usual disarray, and his eyes showed happiness, longing, uncertainty, and sadness. I closed my eyes, and when I opened them, he's directly in front of me.

"Edward." I gave him a big smile and a warm hug. As if nothing happened to us. As if we're the only ones here, standing alone. He awkwardly hugged me back because of the sling, but I still felt the warmth and spark.

"Bella." He said my name like a lullaby or something. I liked the way he did that.

"I missed you." I confessed, not caring about my red cheeks.

"I missed you too. Don't leave again without telling me. I'm so worried. And I'm so sorry." He said sincerely. I looked in his eyes and stole a kiss on his cheek.

"I'm sorry too." I leaned closer to him again. "Welcome home."

"This is definitely home." I lifted my head from his shoulder. I didn't notice the closeness that made up lips touch accidentally.


	15. 14 new suspects

**i updated again! woopie. :] i updated on running away and the promise of happiness yesterday so please review here and there too. :) i'll update faster since i have my ideas set and i don't have classes. READ and REVIEW. :]**

**disclaimer: owns nothing. :(**

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14. New Suspects

This time, I didn't bother kissing Edward. It's not because I didn't care about our past, it was because I couldn't do anything anymore. I couldn't stop myself from kising him. As much as I hate to do this, but I would just let this craziness go by. Maybe he's right, I'd just have to make new memories with him.

The kiss was something I haven't dreamt of ot imagined. The feeling of Edward's lips against mine was wonderful. Words wouldn't be enough to describe it. The spark was there in an instant, and the ghost of the hole ripping my heart apart was gone. It wasas if my heart haven't been broken for the past 3 years.

"That was.." I tried to tell him how I felt about the kiss.

"Amazing." He ended. Sees like hecould read my mind. I looked at him straight in the eyes and saw the passion burning on those emeral orbs. Those eyes, I would gladly stare at them for eternity and not get tired, They're so deep, I thought I have looked straight through Edward's soul.

"Hey lovebirds." Emmett interrupted, faking cough. Nice one big brother, always perfect timing. "We've got to go to headquarters so Edward, please quit sucking the life out of my baby sister's lips." He whined. Typical Emmett.

"I wasn't sucking it, was I?" he asked me with a playful grin on his face.

"Not really." I gave him a peck on the lips before dragging him to our friends. Rose and Alice had this evil smirks. I wished I could wipe it off there faces. I didn't want to have another round of Spanish inquisition with the two of them. Stupid Edward. But then again, I enjoyed our moment.

"Did you even stopped to listen to us shouting your names or both of you are such experts in that field?" my brother wiggled his eyebrows, earning him a smack on the head by Rosalie. Thank God for her.

"Ow." He rubbed the back of his head. We laughed.

"Let's go back. They're waiting for us." Alice said as we followed her and Jasper to the shuttle.

-----

The ride to the headquarters was silent. Emmett and Rose were sitting on the first row, stealing kisses from each other every once in a while. Jasper and Alice, on the other hand, just looked lovingly on each other. They were so in love.

Me? I was sitting at the back, my head resting on Edward's lap. He was playing with a strand of me hair, and he stole kisses on my cheek and forehead at times. I looked up at him and raised an eyebrow.

"What? Is there a problem Ms. Swan?" he asked, flashing me a crooked grin. Ugh. If he just knew how I melt when he smiled like that.

"Nothing. I was just happy to watch our friends go lovey-dovey with their goo-goo eyes staring at each other." I replied playfully. A hint of sadness crossed his features.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry because I was acting so fast at the secret house. I didn't mean to do that. I knew I acted like a jerk, but--" He started to apologize and explain, but I silenced him with a kiss.

"There's nothing to be sorry about. There's nothing to forgive. We both have our faults. It's time to push them aside and make way for each other." I caressed his cheek, feeling it's softness and warmth under my touch. After all this time I've spent with him, he never failed to make me fall for him over and over again.

"True. Well, I was wondering if you have plans tonight? I bet lots of guys asked you for dinner since you arrived her." He asked, a hint of jealousy in his voice.

"Nope. But there's this guy, and I wanted to take his offer. His name is Edward Cullen, and he's the most wonderful thing I've laid my eyes on." He smiled at my words.

"The pleasures all mine, my dear." He grinned as the shuttle stopped.

-----

When we arrived at the headquarters, everyone was looking happilt at us. It was kind of creepy at first, but I got used to the attention they were giving to us. Aro ushered us quickly to the meeting room and discussed what actually happened to the secret house.

It was reported that Tanya and Victoria set up bombs around the house so the boys couldn't escape if they detonate the bombs. They're really planning for sure kill. Apparently, they studied the house's floor plan because there were traps on the windows and the exit doors. They really wanted me dead.

There was a videotape of what the boys were doing during that time. Emmett was looking for some food in the fridge, Jasper was reading a book on the library, and Edward was on _my _room. I was surprised. He was just sitting at the bedn staring at the ceiling. I looked on the window and saw a guy's figure holding a rope. Bingo.

"Who's the guy?" I asked aloud. I didn't have to point it. An idiot or a blind man would be the only one who wouldn't notice or see it.

"He was identified as Riley Freeman, a bomb specialist who worked with their gang all this years. He was the one who set up the bombs. The one who got the copy of the secret house's floor plan was Phil Dwyer." Jasper answered.

"Riley Freeman? Phil Dwyer?" I was shocked. Riley was one of my colleagues at Oxford. He tried to hit on me a few times, but I shove him away. He was a carefree person, as I've known, but he looked suspicious. He was always watching my every move. Phil Dwyer, on the other hand, was one of my mom's past suitors, she told me.

"Why? Is there something wrong Bella?" Edwrd asked, worried.

"Riley was my classmate in Oxford. Phil was part of mom's past." I explained.

"Well. Riley was most likely an undercover, while Phil was there for revenge." Edward concluded. Everyone agreed.

The vidoetape was played continuously, but I didn't notice what happened. All that I was looking at was Edward. He looked so broken, so weak. I could feel his pain even though he's just onscreen.

"You know what? I'd never be like that again if you won't leave." Edward whispered in my ear. I could feel his warm breath tingling my neck.

"I love you." Those words I longed to say. I thought he's going to kick me away, but when I looked at him, all I saw was his smile, so wide I was afraid his face was hurting.

"I love you too." The second those words escape his mouth, I thought my heart's going to explode. He loves me, all this time. His heart really knew me. I hugged him tight, too happy to let him go.

"Didn't I say I wouldn't leave again?" I whispered.

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**good or not so good?**


	16. 15 reflections and laughter

**I updated! After such a long time, sorry! :] Well, this contains Bella's thoughts and some humor( I think it's funny. Lame. Story's need HUMOR. ) Read and review!**

**Disclaimer: Danielle, not Stephenie Meyer. Kay? ;)**

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**15. Reflections and Laughter**

"No. Not yet." Edward quickly took my hand and dragged me outside that room. My heartbeat sped up. What the hell does he think we're going to do? It's not like he's too eager for me to say something.

"Well. Then I have to promise that I would never ever leave again for you. If that makes you happy." I kissed the tip of his nose, trailing butterfly kisses in his cheek to his neck. He opened the emergency exit door and pressed me against the door. I almost moaned. It hurt; walls weren't as soft and fluffly as pillows.

"Bella. I want to feel you. Every inch of you." He seductively whispered in my ear. His husky voice was dripping with love and lust. I myself couldn't control my actions. We moved with our own instinct, since we're both amateurs in this. We didn't strip, that'd be too much. We both deepened the kiss and let our tongues explore each other's mouths.

"I love you so much Edward." I bit the pulse point in his neck, enjoying its softness. That made him give up. Ha! Emmett said to us before that Edward was really controlling. Who's controlling now? We're almost at the peak of our moment when my phone rang,

"Hello?" My voice was breathless. Who expects someone to talk normally after a hot kiss?

"Hey there Bella! Your idiot brother wanted to hang out. You coming?" Jasper was chuckling on the other line. I could hear Alice's and Rose's musical laughter. Maybe Emmett was joking again.

"Yes we're coming." I replied, calming a little. A booming laughter could be heard. Wow. Emmett must be high.

"Well. I think you're gonna come late because Edward looks like he's not yet done kissing you." Emmett didn't even side with me! That pervert brother of mine. Gah! I could feel Edward's nose touch my neck. I could imagine wiggling his eyebrows while some images pass his mind. That bear was really having a piece of my mind.

"Well Emmett, I think Rose would be please if I share to her your oh-so-wonderful dreams about her." I teased. Blackmail was really the best. I could almost hear Alice and Rose gushing about what is it.

"You wouldn't dare." His voice was menacing. I almost got afraid. But hey, this is Emmett we'rea talking about.

"You'll see." Emmett would be surprised her little sister wasn't so innocent after all.

"Ha. You bet. And Eddie-poo. I think you're enjoying my sister's neck too much. If I see something there, you better run because I'll hunt you and hit you where the sun doesn't shine!" He yelled over the line died. Edward obviously heard it, because he's laughing like crazy behind me.

"Emmett was so scary. Oh help me!" He used a high pitched voice. I laughed hard, holding my sides as tear fell on my cheek. He was imitating Emmett when he was trying to act like some slut asking for help from a hero. The others were at the camera room, and they're probably laughing hard too. Add Emmett's not so scary death glare. It's a perfect combination.

"Later people." I took my handkerchief. Edward reached the camera and covered the lens. The handkerchief was thick enough for them not to see through. I sat down cross legged, and Edward rested his lap on my legs.

He was breathing slowly, still tired from the trip. I weaved my hair in his bronze locks, making them messier than usual. He looked so peaceful, like an angel while sleeping. I cupped my hand in his face, feeling its warmth. This was perfect; we're hear at an exit. No need for some room or fancy restaurant.

I have hurt him more than I thought. Keeping away from him wasn't the best thing I could do; staying was better. But this wasn't rational. He didn't know me like before. We're like two strangers, and love at first sight happened to us. He knew nothing about my mistakes, nothing about who I am. We couldn't have a relationship like this.

I love him. Yes. I truly do. I wanted to hold him, to touch him, to feel him every single day of my life. I wanted him to be happy. That's one reason why someone's having a hard time letting go. I wanted Edward so much, but I have to give him up for the best. He had a dream, I shouldn't be a bother. Well, I was wrong.

There's no turning back now. I was here with them. I could make them happy, then one day I'll break my promise to Edward about not leaving. Another way to hurt him, but there's no other choice. I wouldn't watch them suffer, giving up their life because of me. Hello? I was just Isabella Swan.

Planning my departure would be good. I needed someone who could support me with this. Marcus and chief were the only ones I could think about. Marcus knew about my problem, and he's support me because he knew how it felt. Chief could read me like a book. Even though it's hard for him, he would help me. I just have to set up the plan.

"Bella love." Edward muttered in his sleep. He used to do that since middle school, and he teased me about sleeptalking too, only the things I talk about were much more weirder and funnier to listen at. Wait.. Did he just say..?

Love. My heart jumped a bit. That was a foreign emotion to me. This kind of _love _I feel for Edward was something you couldn't just express in words. This love helped me survive all my life, even the struggles I never thought I could pass through was solved because of this. I owed this love to Edward. If it weren't for it, I wouldn't be the strong, but soft clumsy girl. Only this love made my heart swell and break into pieces.

Bella love. He never called me that. Maybe because he's dreaming about me? A girl could dream, couldn't I? Edward falling in love with me was insane. He was straightforward, sweet, and alot more I've been asking for. He wasn't perfect. He had this too overprotective and jealous side with matching temper. Still, I'd love him with all my heart.

"I love you Edward." I kissed his forehead, smelling his honey-lilac-and sun scent. It wasn't any perfume. I doubt there's any perfume that would smell as good as Edward. He opened his eyes.

"Hey love." He took my face in his hand and kissed my cheek.

"Have a good nap?" I asked when he sat down. His sling was still in place.

"Yes. Specially since it's you I'm sleeping at." I blushed. He's really good at teasing or flattering me. Whatever it is, it's bothering me. Was he kidding, flirting, or sincere?

"Whatever. I bet Emmett would want to crush you already for harassing her little sister then kidnapping her." I brushed my mini skirt and hair. I sure looked like a mess.

"Well, who's the one deepening the kiss?" He started. Oh no. He might've forgotten his memories, but he's really good at hitting my soft spots.

"Well, who dragged me out of that room?" I retorted. Take that! He never thought I'd get back to him.

"You're the one who kissed me at the van." He said. I wasn't!

"I have Emmett as a big brother. I can ask him to tie you up and crush you until you say sorry." I stuck a tongue out.

"I have Alice as my sister. She's going to take you shop til you're drop dead that you'll be begging me to carry you in your room." I liked that idea, but who said I'm going to give in?

"I have Rose. She can sneak in your Volvo and mess that up!" Another hit. I knew he would wonder how I knew he had a Volvo, but this was no time to think.

"I can ask Jessica Stanley to dance with me all night and that green monster called jealousy will eat you!" Jessica Stanley? Good choice, Edward. Such a genius. That's why I'm so in love with you.

"I'll ask Mike Newton to go with me to the movies, then he can hold me tight and never let go of me." Perfect! Mike Newton was like a puppy dog when we're still apprentices. How I love seeing Edward angry because of him.

"I can tell Charlie that one time when you got all wasted, and you made me promise not to tell to him." Charlie?! No! He would probably kick Emmett out of the house if he knew that Emmett forced me to drink. I wasn't at the right age that time.

"I can tell Esme that you steal 5% of her cookies every Christmas, which was about 50 pieces." Emmett always asked him to do that every Christmas. Guess he got used to it. He was about to react when the door slammed open.

"Enough with that. We've heard everything. Nice hickey, you two. Same spot too!" Emmett pointed at us, then our necks. Very interesting Emmett.

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**good or not so good?**

_Okaaaay~ Bella's reflection in things. This is kinda filler, so sorry. :] I wanna thank one reviewer there (you know who you are), who reminded me of my promise in this story. Thank you very much!_

_Stay tuned for mooooooore~ :]_


	17. 16 ADOPT COWRITE :

**Important Note here.**

Okay. So to readers of this story, I'm not really sure if I'm still going to continue this. I still have a major writer's block. Even though I have my ideas set here, I can't push myself to write something good. I hope you understand. Anyone who wanted to adopt this story or co-write it with me? Please inform me asap. :]

About adopting this story, I will give it to you, but I want to beta-read it. I think since I started the story, I still have some right to share my thoughts in it. About co-writing this, I would share to you my ideas for the future chapters, or we can help each other rewrite this from the start. You can also share to me your ideas, and we'll add it to the story.

To be honest, I prefer co-writing, but I don't know if I can still give my time because our classes will resume June 1st, I'm in high school, and I'll be busy with stuff. Adoption is the only alternative. Any queries, PM or review.

Hope you understand.

Oreo :)


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